Estimated Space
Nov30
on 2018-11-30
at 16:53
Red tape increases to exceed the available time of those needing services.
↓ Transcript
Ace
Sorry. I’m just popping in. How are you doing?
Kimi
I hurt less. But so very bored.
Ace
Orions are fond of Earth media. Maybe we can find you a waterproof tablet or put up a monitor on a stand.
---
Ready
Kimi-chan, as she insists upon being addressed, is in a somewhat unique situation. Her epidermis is still very fragile Part of the reason we have her floating in gel is to prevent pressure ulceration. Sitting up to read or view a screen would defeat that purpose.
Ace
Couldn’t they hang a monitor face down from the ceiling?
Ready
I see the merits of your suggestion. I have placed an appropriate implementation request.
Ace
Ah, yes. One advantage of The Singularity. No more bureaucratic red tape.
Ready
Sadly, no. I had to look up 12 regulations and fill out 37 forms. But at least I don’t have to sign them.
Carver (off panel)
What the Stones-?!
Narration
Relax. Han’ll be ready to sign off once han reads the justification on page 5. And the cost estimate on Appendix B isn’t all that high.
Sorry. I’m just popping in. How are you doing?
Kimi
I hurt less. But so very bored.
Ace
Orions are fond of Earth media. Maybe we can find you a waterproof tablet or put up a monitor on a stand.
---
Ready
Kimi-chan, as she insists upon being addressed, is in a somewhat unique situation. Her epidermis is still very fragile Part of the reason we have her floating in gel is to prevent pressure ulceration. Sitting up to read or view a screen would defeat that purpose.
Ace
Couldn’t they hang a monitor face down from the ceiling?
Ready
I see the merits of your suggestion. I have placed an appropriate implementation request.
Ace
Ah, yes. One advantage of The Singularity. No more bureaucratic red tape.
Ready
Sadly, no. I had to look up 12 regulations and fill out 37 forms. But at least I don’t have to sign them.
Carver (off panel)
What the Stones-?!
Narration
Relax. Han’ll be ready to sign off once han reads the justification on page 5. And the cost estimate on Appendix B isn’t all that high.
May not avoid Red Tape, butt The Singularity makes it faster to slash through it (can remember a scene from an Asterix movie, where Asterix has to get a form signed or something, and kept being sent all over the place, until he smartened up and got them running all over the place looking for a form that doesn’t exist 😀 Look for “The House That Sends You Mad”)
The bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of of the expanding bureaucracy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=75oun5gvDAU&t=116s
I didn’t say “bureaucracy.” I said “red tape.”
The cost should not be a problem. Ace has a lot of Orion money he can’t spend anywhere else, bill him.
.
.
.
No, I think the real problem will be when the Orions decide this is another one of Ace’s money-making ideas and start adding more credits to his fortune.
Yeah. But that takes another 4 forms, two of which are over 20 pages.
Well, at least they are paperless forms … Right?
Filling them out? Yes. But they have to be printed, each page signed or initialed, in triplicate, scanned, electronically filed, shredded, and disintegrated, in person.
WOW!
So much for higher technology …
Reminds me of something from The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy: Any order must be signed in triplicate, sent in, sent back, queried, lost, found, subjected to public inquiry, lost again, and finally buried in soft peat for three months and recycled as firelighters.
I still swear this is the way the VA works. My paperwork for funds for college was bounced between cities multiple times, lost and found again at least twice, and they kept asking for my retirement paperwork despite multiple times pointing out that I was a dependent receiving benefits based on a parental death. The DD-219 was my father’s. Then they tried to tell me I couldn’t get the benefits because too much time had passed. Fortunately I had someone on my side at the college office willing to verify that one of their staff had misfired my paperwork (put it in a random cubby where it didn’t belong) where it spent 6 months, and would they please just process it and get me my funds. (I’m still very grateful to this nice honest lady for her help.)
Correction DD-219 should read DD-214 (this is what I get for relying on memory rather than looking it up.
Also my paperwork was misfiled not misfired. Gotta love auto correct.
Yeah… I was wondering what would be the consequences of having your paperwork misfire?
The printer, copier, or fax machine jams, and needs to be cleared and reloaded. Just like any other misfire.
I also wanted to comment that if you could only turn red tape into an clean energy source, not only would we never have to worry about running out of fuel, but government agencies could not only cover their bidgets, they could turn a profit.
The other thought is that for some reason going to a paperless system seems to take 3X more paper to work and for some unknowable reason once you switch there is no going back.
TVs on flexible arms coming down from the ceiling have been pretty standard in hospital rooms in most hospitals I’ve ever been in, for as long as I can recall being in them (I’m born in 1980, so let’s say 1990-onward, at least). Mind you, the hospital typically charged you to turn them on, and not exactly cheap either, to the point my parents thought it wasn’t worth it if I was only staying for two days with a broken ankle. 🙁
…unless you had a cool uncle who is very technically competent visiting, who quickly found the hidden “locking” switch on the back of the TV and turned it with his Swiss Army knife. Then you could have a new two day game of how quickly can you turn off the TV (by it’s normal power controls, on the front) before the nurses walk in and remember you haven’t paid for cable. They caught me on my last day. 😛
Anyway… just pointing out that Ace’s idea isn’t necessarily his own.